Healing in relationships isn’t something that magically happens on its own. There are many elements involved especially when it comes to things like communication.
I woke up in the middle of the night thinking about how we communicate with each other. We talk about things we physically see in the moment, like, ‘you got a new hairdo…looks great’ or ‘I can see you’re off the phone now.’ We also talk about things we don’t see or are invisible to the naked eye, like, ‘well you don’t have to get angry with me’ or ‘I can tell your head must be spinning with new ideas.’
Of all the things we talk about in relationships, how many of them are expressed accurately? Have you ever thought about that?
We can be pretty accurate when talking about the physical things we see, as we see them.
There’s not much accuracy when expressing things based on what the mind wants us to bring up for conversations. Why? Because the majority of the thoughts in our mind have to do with past experiences like ‘there’re doing it again, they never seem to get anything right’ or thoughts related to the future like ‘maybe some day he’ll actually hear what I have to say.’ Both the past and the future thoughts are not always accurately expressed.
Our thoughts don’t allow for accuracy in the present and tend to be filled with things like the following:
· Something we’re not happy with and want to be different;
· Negative impressions of memories we’ve experienced from the past;
· Negative assumptions, predictions or projections into the future.
How many of those are accurate? What has been your experience? Does it matter? Well I invite you to consider…it matters in relationships if what we’re thinking is creating disharmony with others around us.
It has been my experience when we’re struggling or in conflict with the people in our lives, whether personally or professionally, we have an opportunity to become aware of what’s going on inside in relation to what’s happening outside of us.
Is there something we need to pay attention to inside in order for healing to take place in our relationships?
There’s nothing more powerful than our own grace and awareness. Why?
When we have awareness we have everything and that includes getting to make new choices.
Beginning in January I’m offering an 8-week online course focused on the communication process and more. If you’re finding you struggle with what to say or how to say it…this course may be for you… https://theuniqueapproach.com/healing-from-the-inside-out/
Wherever you are on your journey, may you find what works for you…find your own truth…and you will always be guided to feel at peace inside.
Sheila Unique, Emotional Intelligence Specialist
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