Have you ever wondered what causes people to want to hurt other people? What would cause someone to get so mad they punch someone in the face? What would cause someone to get so mad they say mean things to another person? Well, hurt people, hurt people.
Think of a time when you were so mad at someone you had to tell them about it? In your state of anger you told them what makes you mad about what they did and how they need to change. Were you very successful in making them change? Where is the anger coming from? Is it coming from the fact that you can’t change them or you can’t change yourself?
Who has the issue? The person with the issue is the person who is reacting. The person who is mad (mad is a reaction) is the one who has the issue about something and it is that person who will resolve whatever is causing them to be mad.
Here are some words that may stop an argument or a fight cold: ‘What hurts you so bad that you feel you have to hurt me in order for you to heal it? Obviously something hurts you…tell me what happened that hurt you so bad it’s causing you to want to hurt me?’ When someone lashes out in anger, they are hurting inside. The hurt was there long before the anger surfaced.
Think of those words the next time someone wants to hurt you; think of those words the next time you feel like hurting someone else. Don’t believe me…try saying those words for yourself. How will that change things for you? I would love to hear what transpires.
If you are hurting inside you will know in the moment of wanting to hurt someone else. What is causing the hurt?